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giving yourself permission to grieve

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giving yourself permission to grieve

Post by Cloud on Thu Apr 12, 2018 7:47 am

..Giving yourself permission  to grieve


Is one of the most important things you can do to heal and survive this journey

Cry all you need to
Think of them as much as you need to
Speak their name as often as you must without feeling guilty

There is no right or wrong , this is your journey, your
loved one
No two losses are the same. I know people mean well when they give advice but remember, your ways of coping may be different from others, that is completely ok

Carry no guilt for getting rid of their items or taking their photos down
Carry no guilt for having no photos or belongings of thiers
Carry no guilt for giving their things away ...
Forgive yourself

Please don't even feel guilty for not attending their funeral, if you couldn't handle it. Many of us can't.. that's ok too

If you forgot an anniversary or birthday, forgive yourself... it happens, you're human. I love you

For everything you feel you could have said or done
those things you wish you never had

You're human, you make mistakes.. your loved one wouldn't want you to carry that with you


Let yourself scream, cry, be angry. sleep all you need to. Eat all you need to. Spend as much time alone as you need to (provided it helps you)

Focus on yourself and others affected completely

There's no right way to deal with it, grief can be a tangled mess or it can follow the usual motions

There are really no right or wrongs... you need to do what you need to do


I wanted to share this here because at one point in my journey I was finding myself saying sorry for talking about passed loved ones. In hindsight, we should never have to apologize to anybody for talking about/remembering our loved ones or grieving. A huge part of healing from a loss is working through , expressing your pain, so you can receive support yourself

Cry, shout, be angry
it doesn't matter how you heal..ultimately our loved ones just want us to not suffer more than we already are once they have passed on


Whilst grieving we are fragile and we need supportive people around us who understand our love for our relatives and friends. You are grieving strongly because you loved them strongly, not because you are weak.

Not at all.

Never apologize for how you are feeling

Take all the time you need
Do what you need


I love you
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Re: giving yourself permission to grieve

Post by Cloud on Tue Aug 14, 2018 4:45 pm

'bump'

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Re: giving yourself permission to grieve

Post by Dragon on Wed Aug 15, 2018 2:41 am



hugs  :love:  Cloud :love: hugs

Very empowering.
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=========================================

""Cloud""

Is one of the most important things you can do to heal and survive this journey

I wanted to share this here because at one point in my journey I was finding myself saying sorry for talking about passed loved ones. In hindsight, we should never have to apologize to anybody for talking about/remembering our loved ones or grieving. A huge part of healing from a loss is working through , expressing your pain, so you can receive support yourself


Never apologize for how you are feeling

Take all the time you need
Do what you need❤

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Re: giving yourself permission to grieve

Post by Elvis2015 on Sun Sep 16, 2018 6:45 pm

I just read this, and it's such a beautiful post. I have been struggling with the demise of my father and have lost resilience and coping strategies. It's like everyone around me has moved on with the loss, and I'm the only one who has regressed and keeps re-living the entire moments leading up to his death. The post reassures me that it's ok to take my time, and find my own ways to heal.
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Re: giving yourself permission to grieve

Post by Saturn on Tue Sep 18, 2018 2:40 am

Elvis wrote:New post by Elvis2015 on Sun Sep 16, 2018 6:45 pm

.

New post by Elvis2015 on Sun Sep 16, 2018 6:45 pm

.



I just read this, and it's such a beautiful post. I have been struggling with the demise of my father and have lost resilience and coping strategies. It's like everyone around me has moved on with the loss, and I'm the only one who has regressed and keeps re-living the entire moments leading up to his death. The post reassures me that it's ok to take my time, and find my own ways to heal.
I just read this, and it's such a beautiful post. I have been struggling with the demise of my father and have lost resilience and coping strategies. It's like everyone around me has moved on with the loss, and I'm the only one who has regressed and keeps re-living the entire moments leading up to his death. The post reassures me that it's ok to take my time, and find my own ways to heal.

I hear you Elvis it's so hard when it seems everybody (or at least a huge handful ) of people family or friends have moved on or forgotten about him
You are perfectly right you have every right to take your time I think rushing through grief healing is so damaging. It will never go away, the only way is through it. But it's hard when you feel alone going through it. Trust you're not. There's nothing harder than losing our loved ones and re living the days and moments leading up to their demise each and every day
Do you have anybody you can confide in and talk to?
Have you thought about going to therapy to help you maybe a grief counsellor?
Have any good friends,?
Considered a support group?

It's so hard , I have had that before where it's just like re living the same day , every day. You remember every detail. I went through this where I was doubting everything I did or didn't do. Kind of blaming myself in some ways for missing the signs. But the more I talked to other people the more I realized it was going to happen no matter what I did. I think the day that I realized it was out of my hands and not my fault I found a bit more peace. I just really relate to feeling so alone in it but I promise you are not, stick around here, we'll be here for you
Much love
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Re: giving yourself permission to grieve

Post by Elvis2015 on Tue Sep 18, 2018 9:00 am

Thanks Saturn, it's such a huge support to get to read your comments and concern. I have only recently started talking about it to a psychologist and this is the only forum I'm connecting on, and already finding relief. You're right, sharing thoughts with like minded , caring people helps take away some of the burden I am carrying and I consider myself fortunate to have found this group.
Thank you for sharing and caring.
Hugs
"Sleepless in Canada"
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